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Mengalahkan Rasa Takut akan Tenggelam

Makanan setelah renang di KOOD Sanur (serba vegan) Dari dulu takut banget sama air dengan volume yang besar. Mungkin di kehidupan gw sebelumnya gw pernah tenggelem kali ya. Makanya nggak pernah bisa renang. Karena ya takut tenggelam. Bahkan sekedar kecipak kecipuk aja takut. Sampai pindah ke Bali. Pindah ke Bali nggak berekspektasi setinggi itu sih. Ternyata, jadi lebih sering main air di pantai. Nggak renang, cuma berendam aja. Lama-lama jadi kebiasaan dan udah mulai terbiasa dengan air. Ternyata seru juga yaa. Kemudian dilatih suami gw buat berani snorkeling. Iya takut awalnya, nggak percaya meskipun dia bilang nggak akan tenggelam karena pake fin. Hmm masaaaa~~ Ya tetep pake pelampung sih. Pertama kali nyemplung, tentu saja heboh takut tenggelam padahal udah pake pelampung, pake fin, mana dipegangin juga. Tapi heboh aja, takut tenggelem. Ada 3 spot waktu itu, gw cuma nyemplung satu spot aja belum juga 15 menit udah naik kapal. Beberapa kali snorkeling akhirnya baru berani lepas pela

Hey Grandpa

Hey Grandpa, it's been a long time I didn't write to you. Hmm did I tell you about me, about what had happened to me recently? Guess I didn't. Now let me tell you few things in my life a bit.

I moved to Surabaya since September 2015. As you know this city wouldn't be my choice at all, but 8months here I start to enjoy it. I feel fine and it is ok now. Hmm maybe because I am easy to adapt in new place. I left half of my heart in Malang. Malang will always be part of me and I always be a part of Malang. Proud to see Aremania there. Blue and Lions everywhere. But I have to leave it for now. I will be back to Malang, someday.

I am now working in one of best multinational company here. Maybe you would be happy to see it. Mama and mami are happy as well. Well, I enjoy it now. It is fine. I wish I could tell you directly about it 😊

Ohh Papi, Dhea got accepted in one of best university. Where I really want to work there haha, she has this good oportunity by the way. Proud of her. She works really really hard and as we know, efforts never betray the result itself. She even didn't date any of her friends like I did when I was 18. She doesn't make time for it. All she knows just studying and studying. Not so good, but she enjoy it with her own ways to.

And Cimi, she had her phone to play games. She loves games. She is grown up so fast. She is 9 years old and she always pray when she has exams or she want something. 'Cim, have you pray?', she will answer 'yes of course, tomorrow is exams so I pray everyday'. 'Ehhh do you think by praying only you will get a good score?', then she said 'hmm maybe yes, I hope'. Mum will say 'GO GET YOUR BOOK AND STUDY!'.

It is funny. She is funny. Other day she pray 'Ya Allah, give my dad and mum much money so they could buy me a phone with full of games'. She always act funny. Just had her birthday, 9 years old and she got a phone.

Mami in a good condition, as long as she is active to talk and us as her objects to release anger, that is mean she is healthy. Totally healthy. Dad and mum are fine as well.

Ooh.. I met someone. Someone whom I trust and I love. We love each other. But I am just worried if I am not good enough for him. If only you could see him, I bet you would like him as mama and mami does. They like him. At first, they don't let us to go further, slowly but sure they start to change their minds and let us to go further. I am happy to meet him. Yes we have some difficulties but difficult doesn't mean impossible. He would take care of me. Hmm I wish you could see him in person and tell him to take care of me, your first granddaughter. Or maybe you would say 'you have to respect your man, obey him, and have a good life with him'.

I wish I could turn back the time. I know I can't. I just miss you. Miss the way you look at me. Miss the way you tell me things about life. Miss the way you tell me about the life you had when Dutch came to colonialize us. Oh by the way, the man I love is a Dutchie Papi. I wish you would like him and maybe tell him a little about our countries history. I think he would love to hear it although he knows a lot about our countries history.

I am here, always miss you, Papi.
Soerabaja, April 10, 2016

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