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If Money Wasn't The Problem, What Would You Do?

In this extraordinary life, I would be a teacher still.  Helping people to understand even some little things to make them feel worthy and understand themselves better. It seems that teaching has become a calling for me. Not about teaching such specific subject like mathematics or so, but more like... I like to give new perspectives for people, and having them saying "Oh.... I see..." is satisfying for me. Of course, by teaching I can learn so many new perspectives from different people too. It's like the more I teach the more I learn, and that is so true. Maybe more like a guide. I like giving guidance to people who needs it. No, I don't like giving unsolicited guiding. I like to guide people who wants to be guided. I'd teach them how to love, love themselves first. Yea sure when we are talking about things, they would say "do useful things like engineering, plumbing, this and that" but they tend to forget that we need some balance in life. Not saying t

Death used to be so far away from my family

I am turning 30 soon. I was excited that "Woah! My 30's gonna be something! I am excited." But I also forgot that it means we're getting older. My parents, uncles, aunties, everyone I have in my life. I still see them like a child seeing her important adults in her life. I always thought that I am 5 and they're in their 30's. Not realising that they're entering their 50's.

My uncle passed away this morning. I am feeling closer to uncles from my mom side than from my dad's. Even though we were closed when I was a kid and we became like a stranger lately, but I have my own place for him in my heart. I thought, I wouldn't cry. I was wrong. I sat down when I made breakfast this morning and I cried. It is breaking my heart. How could he left me like that? It's unfair for him. 

I called my cousin after his funeral. First thing she said was “I dont have a father anymore” 😔 Breaks my heart even more.

Not only him, my aunties and uncle from my father side too. They're leaving one by one. They were my closest people too. I lost too many in two years. It breaks my heart. 

I am afraid, I told my friend this morning. Remember that our time here is temporary and every day matters, he said. I guess he's right. 

Omoni, that's how I used to call you instead of Om Roni. You were such a beautiful soul. Thank you for breaking my arm back then when I was just 4. Now you're breaking my heart 💔.  Enjoy your next journey. Would you please say hi to mami and papi there? Tell them I miss them so much. You'll be missed 💙

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