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Getting my Hands on Film Camera

In attempts to slow_myself_down_away_from_digital_life, I am getting my hands on film camera. Yes, the kind of camera where you need to put the film roll in and then start snapping. If you are lucky, the pictures will turn up good but if not then we let the fate decide. This is not my first rodeo on using film camera, but it definitely the first ever to buy the film and develop it using my own money. It is not cheap, which I know.  What can I say, it's an expensive hobby.  I used my first film roll to take photos of my favorite people. So it has more human than random pictures. It was on family event. After the last shot, I wanted to develop it before I flew to Bali but they had no lab. Luckily we have the lab in Bali. I developed and scanned the film in Ojisanfilmlab Bali. They're just a google away. They sell the roll as well. I had to tell the TSA to do the hand checking rather putting it through the scanner. They understood.  Cimol hides himself in his favorite spot ...

What My Grandma Always Told Me

Daisies in Diepenheim

Now I understand why my grandma always told me to take shower, put on nice clothes, put on light make up even when I had no plan to go out. 

I grew up like other kids who never wanted to be told to get shower in the afternoon, or early in the morning. I said, "Why do I need to take shower now? I have no plan to go anywhere." of course, because I thought back then you should look presentable when you need to go out, but not when you're home. My grandma would said, "Ihh you have to clean up yourself and be representable. You look like abandoned kid now! Go get shower."

I hated it. I mean, I dont hate taking shower. I just dont like to be told to do something. 

My grandma would always put on light make up, nice lipstick, after shower. She always kept her wudhu with her after afternoon shower so she doesn't need to wipe her make up when she needed to pray. She always smells good. And oh, she asked the ER nurse to bring her lipstick and powder when she admitted to ER. The nurse seemed shocked but we knew that, she asked why then my grandma said "I have to look beautiful even when I am in ER right now."

Time flies and I am a grown up now. Had a phase in my life where I felt so depressed for months and the only achievement of the day that I could get was able to get my ass off the bed, took shower, and dressed up nicely. That was a little moment when I felt good about myself even just for a little a bit. 

This morning, I planned to go to the beach to have my walk. But the sun shines so bright this morning so I canceled my plan, and will be going this afternoon instead. I am all dressed up, put on skincare, light make up, and I smell good. It already made my day!

Then I remember how I always dressed up even when I am home teaching my kids online, I always put on nice clothes because I like it. Putting on light make up because I look fresher that way. All nice and fresh. That reminds me of my grandma.

Now I understand what she meant by looking nice and presentable even when you have no plan to go out. It's because it's nice to look at ourselves that way. You don't need people to see how beautiful or good-looking you are, but you present that beauty to yourself. Nothing fancy, just looking nice and smells good. Women love beautiful things indeed. 


I miss you, mami!

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