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Rambut yang Menyuburkan

Awal bentukan sansiviera gw. Bukan, bukan rambut gw yang subur kok bukan. Rambut gw masih mengalami patah tulang harian, rontok kemana-mana ya tuhan susah bener biar rambut panjang gak rontok. Jadi ceritanya gw punya sansiviera kan, hadiah ulang tahun lalu. Dia mini gitu kan, batangnya banyak banget rimbun. Setelah gw tinggal berminggu-minggu, dia ternyata letoy karena kurang sinar mentari dan air. Hingga batangnya tersisa 4 dan akarnya semi busuk.  Posisi batang sudah mulai tegak Sansiviera ini termasuk tumbuhan yang tahan banting menurut gw. Daripada gw buang, yaudah lah gw tunggu dulu. Gw pindah ke pot, gw pangkas akar busuknya, gw tata lagi. Eh makin lama kok makin lemes yaa batangnya nih. Agak stres juga masa sih mati nih tumbuhan kan gw dapet hadiah.  Lalu, nggak tahu kenapa tiba-tiba gw dapet ilham buat naro rontokan rambut gw di pot. Gw cari dong apa iya sih rambut bisa nyuburin tanaman. Dapet beberapa dari hasil googling, katanya sebagai pengganti urea. Yahhh yaudah lah coba a

You'll Be Missed, Grandma

 
I took this flower-picture a few minutes before you leave us. That was the only time I leave you out of my sight.

It's been a week, you are not around. Usually you open my door in the morning while holding Molly the cat, and said "Wake up, don't be late to work" Haven't heard that for a week now. 

All of sudden you can't walk, you can't lift your arm, you can't talk properly you got a speech problem, you got a severe headache. Well it was not easy to bring you back to your room from the kitchen since you were well.. heavy. But I see it now as a kind of chance you gave me (and my lil sister) and I am thankful for that.

It was a stroke and you had more than 50% blockage blood vessels in your brain. It was weird since you felt nothing before and you were fine. Nothing different physically. We really hoped that you'll recover. We even got plans how to take care of you when you leave hospital.

But God knows better, right? God took you back right in front of me, my little sister and your first son.

We thought, you'll recover soon as you can lift your leg and arm although it was for a bit only. You even talked normal again. Even asked me how was the chicken curry you cooked the day you got the stroke. You even asked all of my friends. You were so chatty. That is why you knew all of my friends although you haven't meet them. You don't even need to see them and yet you always ask me about them. You recognize me. You recognize everyone who visit you there. How can I not think that you'll recover?

It is not easy for me. It is the first death I've seen with my own eyes, and it was yours. I saw you. I clearly saw you. My legs were frozen when doctor said that you're gone. I can't believe it. Ya how can I believe it if 30 mins ago for 2 hours you asked us to massage your legs and arms non stop while you were talking about people you know?

I tried to shake your body, who knows you'll wake up right? But no. You look like in a deep sleep. Can't really cry until I saw you were about to leave us. I am sorry, burst into tears that much when I saw you in your grave. It just too painful to see you leave us that suddenly.

But we will be too selfish if we want you stay with those pain you felt. I am sure it was too painful for you to survive.


Now you leave us to be with Papi. He's been waiting for you for 12 years and your grave is next to his. It is beautiful to see you both that way. You look so beautiful in your last moment.

So now, farewell grandma. Greeting to papi. Tell him we miss him so much. And mami, you'll be missed 💙

We love you.

Sat, 11 May 2019

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